TTC The Journey

A & I started TTC the day we got married, June 28, 2009. We knew it wasn't going to be an easy journey and it was quickly confirmed to be the case. We started with 2 failed rounds of Clomid. BUST--I didn't even respond. FIGURES! We knew that IUI wasn't for us as I had issues with the thought of selective reduction (SR). We thought long & hard about the next step in our journey and made the decision to try IVF. The long process began and we were so excited. Shots, drs. appointments, shots & more shots. I responded very well to the injections and we seemed to be great candidates for this. They were able to retrieve 26 eggs & 19 fertilized. We were thrilled. The froze 12 right away leaving 7 to watch & grow. We ended up transferring 2 beautiful blastocysts in April, 2009. The 2ww was a killer and I knew I wasn't pregnant. Turns out I was pregnant & we just didn't know how to act. This excitement came to a shreaching halt on May 15, 2009 when I went to the bathroom and discovered bright red blood. I knew my babies were being taken away from me. It was the hardest experience of my life. I wanted nothing more than to be a mother, the Lord gave them to me and then He took them away. I had to remember & try to remind myself that ALL things happen for a reason to those that love that Lord! We jumped back on the saddle rather quickly and did 2 more frozen embryo transfers (FETs). The 1st we transferred 3, 3 day embryos and the 2nd we transferred 2 more blasts. I didn't get pregnant with either of these round. I felt this journey crumbling quickly around me and didn't know where we were going to turn. We have 1 snowbaby left & I just the thought of going through all the pain; emotionally & physically killed me. We took a much needed break which lasted about 3 months.

One day while driving home from work I thought to myself why not give Clomid another shot. Dr. B wanted me to continue to get my period while waiting to do our 4 IVF cycle & I just finished taking Provera. Aunt Flo (AF) was due any day so I called the Dr. office to see their thoughts. I then told A my thoughts to see what he thought. He's so wonderful he just says whatever you think is best I'm fine with. The Dr. agreed to give it a go so here were again....on the saddle of TTC this time moving backwards in the journey. Silly I know.

I took 150mg of Clomid on CD 4-8. I went for my 1st follie check on CD14 and on course nada. I knew it...this round was another BUST. They wanted me to come back on CD17 just to confirm BUST but I said No. I wasn't going to pay a co-pay for them to say FAIL or come back in 3 more days. So I said, I'll come back in a week and that way we'll know if we're in or out of the game this round. So on CD 21 I showed up in the office not quite sure how to feel but certain I was going to leave the office with that empty feeling I so often leave with. The nurse started the U/S and said...Well I think we have something brewing. Low & behold I had 2 follies growing. They were still small (12 & 9) but none the less it was something. I went back on CD24 and they continued to grow (15 & 12). My estrogen (E2) also was rising. Slowly but it was a rise. They needed me to continue to come back as I was never so excited in all my life. My body was actually working!!!! **YAY** On CD28 the U/S showed 2 follies (26 & 16) and my lining was greater than 10. My estrogen had spiked from 75 to 254. I was told that tonight was trigger night. It's really happening...I left the office & called A right away with the great news. We actually had to BD for a purpose!! I ended up Oing on CD30, January 6, 2010!

This will be a date that I will Never forget!!!!